I forgot to mention, my mom gave me permission to go out on one date. I’ve since been on several and now am going steady with someone. Very happy, he’s very supportive :)
update 2a. He removed the spider silk sac from my apartment. Praise the Lord (and pass the ammunition) :)
In addition to feeling increasingly suicidal I’ve noticed my disturbing desire to be harmed or murdered. Idek what I want or need seeing as though medicine and therapy only seem to make things worse
SO basically this is what’s going on in my life right now and so I think I will take some kind of hiatus for a little when school starts. I’ll still be posting, I would just close my ask box and probably ask that people not really contact me too much if it’s not 100% needed or w.e. idk. I appreciate all of the support I commonly get but I just ask not to really be contacted about this right now, idk what’s even going on right now in my life
and my cat’s reaction was to freak out and meow wildly lol. On another note, my stomach muscles feel weird, like tired, any idea on what I can do besides take meds and that involves minimal movement?
The good news is that he’s much more knowledgable about mental health and has a lot of ideas of what might work for my depression, paranoia and hallucinations the very bad news is that, even though my instance is great on the west coast and some parts of the south, it sucks ass here and won’t cover most of the meds he wants to put me on..
Starting off on weight loss journey today D: in an attempt to get my life together as my body in order. I promise not to spam y’all with my gross body pics and annoying (possibly triggering) weight counts. Tips are sooooo appreciated!
Dear person who gifted this from my wishlist (I’m going to try and see if amazon will at least share your email with me so I can email you ‘thank you’) YOU ARE FREAKING AWESOME!! I’m so happy, you have no idea…it’s bad enough feeling depressed, alone and suicidal but it’s even harder when some of the few things that you enjoy (gardening, cooking, shooting, camping..) are out of reach because of financial reasons. I’m so happy I have herbs now because I couldn’t afford to have much of a garden this year (herbs are esp awesome because they multiply and grow easily). I’m also happy that I can cook with herbs again and use them to make tea and facial steams/washes. I’m super duper happy that they all require full sun because my tree got cut down (it was diseased) and now I don’t have much partially shady space for plants that require it. I’m just so happy fjdioijofdijodfiojsifodjsodfij